I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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