I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
