I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
