youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
My liver just broke up with me...
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
