Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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