Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Randomize
