Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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