I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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