Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
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I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
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The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
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