This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
