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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.

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• (914): View more from New York

  Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (214): View more from Texas

  only if we run a train.

  (1-214): View more from Texas

  done.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.

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• (305): View more from Florida

  I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (415): View more from California

  My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!

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• (516): View more from New York

  Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow

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• (925): View more from California

  I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine

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