Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?

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  (202): so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis? http://tfl.nu/6d0w
  Replies (7) Good night (796) Bad night (477)
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  (760): View more from California

  ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!

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  (760): ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!! http://tfl.nu/73h7
  Replies (68) Good night (1515) Bad night (519)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS

  (210): View more from Texas

  Put my glitter back.

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  (214): Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS (210): Put my glitter back. http://tfl.nu/4pgc
  Replies (16) Good night (3230) Bad night (599)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill

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  (561): next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill http://tfl.nu/y326
  Replies (12) Good night (573) Bad night (2936)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it

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  (970): If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it http://tfl.nu/jxp6
  Replies (16) Good night (6448) Bad night (757)
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  (516): View more from New York

  my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?

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  (516): my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight? http://tfl.nu/m93n
  Replies (110) Good night (33599) Bad night (1350)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.

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  (970): So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am. http://tfl.nu/w1ts
  Replies (34) Good night (4619) Bad night (1284)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.

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  (330): Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor. http://tfl.nu/41un
  Replies (5) Good night (2112) Bad night (937)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.

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  (914): Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night. http://tfl.nu/nj6b
  Replies (3) Good night (2175) Bad night (526)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.

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  (780): Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex. http://tfl.nu/0kw1
  Replies (7) Good night (983) Bad night (602)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve

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  (330): I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve http://tfl.nu/wq9l
  Replies (3) Good night (914) Bad night (367)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.

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  (574): He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle. http://tfl.nu/u8g2
  Replies (4) Good night (333) Bad night (1070)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.

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  (904): That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring. http://tfl.nu/5dnd
  Replies (1) Good night (552) Bad night (232)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit

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  (215): I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit http://tfl.nu/jw8x
  Replies (0) Good night (535) Bad night (467)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!

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  (317): Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard! http://tfl.nu/ozlx
  Replies (0) Good night (529) Bad night (196)

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