is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
