I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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