Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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