I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
