There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize