do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
