I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
