Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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