What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
If I die, sorry about rent.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize