Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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