I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Randomize