my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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