Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
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