You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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