You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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