I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize