so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
It was a blind-side dick pic.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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