what day is it and did you see me today?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
