I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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