Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
