So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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