Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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