I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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