Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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