your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
we're making bets on your personal life
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
