i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
