You can't special order awesome
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
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