Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
