Duck Duck Cougar?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize