I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize