dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
