Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.

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  (612): from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/b39s
  Replies (27) Good night (764) Bad night (1441)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.

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  (630): Just got done shaving my balls. You were right. http://tfl.nu/e0qo
  Replies (22) Good night (1843) Bad night (767)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight

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  (802): that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight http://tfl.nu/exu9
  Replies (73) Good night (1189) Bad night (2802)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3

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  (480): gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3 http://tfl.nu/7tkz
  Replies (5) Good night (3238) Bad night (575)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today

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  (715): ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today http://tfl.nu/9i5r
  Replies (56) Good night (881) Bad night (1587)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?

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  (617): I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks? http://tfl.nu/26q7
  Replies (55) Good night (2145) Bad night (6612)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard

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  (862): I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard http://tfl.nu/ecro
  Replies (21) Good night (5902) Bad night (1123)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.

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  (865): Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america. http://tfl.nu/zhnq
  Replies (6) Good night (1693) Bad night (1517)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.

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  (402): Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week. http://tfl.nu/y6xg
  Replies (16) Good night (3833) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"

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  (407): I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist" http://tfl.nu/osi4
  Replies (5) Good night (1900) Bad night (545)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"

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  (571): Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?" http://tfl.nu/imih
  Replies (6) Good night (1719) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.

  (905): View more from Ontario

  Fuhga

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Thank you.

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  (250): The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive. (905): Fuhga (250): Thank you. http://tfl.nu/3pok
  Replies (3) Good night (1465) Bad night (620)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard

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  (610): I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard http://tfl.nu/mt5d
  Replies (3) Good night (1243) Bad night (323)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong

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  (903): I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong http://tfl.nu/enrc
  Replies (4) Good night (664) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?

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  (619): Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit? http://tfl.nu/j01e
  Replies (5) Good night (937) Bad night (272)

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