what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
