What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize