How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize