no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Randomize