she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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