doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
