He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I just found puke in my bra..
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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