I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
